Revisit Your Goals

6:41:00 PM




When creatives start the process of becoming a creative, we look somewhere for inspiration of who or what we want to be. As we practice our craft and redefine it, our goals change. However, more than too often, we get completely lost. Normally, going off the path is a great thing, but when you're so far off you don't even see anything remotely appealing, it's time to jump off. And tragically sometimes when we go to take the leap, we realized we're already falling for a very long time. The funny thing about falling, is for a little moment, it feels like soaring. For a short time, no matter how much you hate where you ended up, you felt like you were falling on to the yellow brick road: like the path was perfectly right.

Much like Dorothy, we quickly figure out we needed others assistance to get us out of there. I started to realize I was falling when photoshoots held no excitement for me, when the thing I once enjoyed felt like a chore. The truth of the matter was, I spent 70% of my time as a photographer doing the work others wanted to see from me -the work that yes taught me a lot, but didn't fulfill me much anymore. Many photographers call this, "the monkey with a camera" effect. Pretty much stating, we're paid to push buttons, not to see and most definitely not for our passion. It's absolutely frightening to realize you've become the monkey, but it's even more frightening to stay the monkey. I had to visit my past self to figure out what I fell in love with from the start.

A few months into photography, I realized I loved portraiture. Soon after that, I fell in love with the glossy pages of magazines. I knew I wanted to make my impact on that industry. However, I haven't even taken the first step (or even stopped and asked directions) on my path to the commercial portrait industry. I used to excuse this by saying: Well I'm still learning, One day I'll shoot it so it won't matter today. I'm not experienced enough to know where to start. Once you realize you were falling, excuses mean nothing because you've got no where to go but up; after all you've already experienced plummeting down. The day I realized I was falling, I called my friend Liz to play model and started planning how to get out of Oz.

Of course I looked at glossys to get a inspiration of what I wanted, but I still didn't want to lose the style that shooting client work gave me. I wanted to take photographs that rather then just look beautiful, showed how naturally beautiful Liz is. During the shoot, for the first time in a really really long time, I was in control of everything. The hair, the wardrobe, the makeup, the model, the lighting, every little aspect. If this shoot failed, it'd be all on me. Something about that was absolutely refreshing. I couldn't turn back later and say,

"Well I'd rather have had a lighter makeup and less formal clothes, but the client---". 


There was no client, only my own ego to please. Like my previous photoshoots taught me, I had nothing to fear. I already proved I earned my right to step into the arena: I now just had to defend myself. Every photographer I look up to, Chase Jarvis, Lara Jade, Joey L, Zack Arias, and Sue Bryce, claim personal shoots are the way to go. They teach us about ourselves; a lot more than any client shoot ever will. It's also completely enlightening to create the work you see in your brain without being told by anyone else to create it. Like a sort of meditation, you can refine your skills and your own pace, without deadlines. The ultimate freedom as a creative.


I once heard someone say, "To be creative means to take a dive and build your wings on the way down." But sometimes we get the illusion we're already walking on solid ground, only to look down and see it crumbled beneath us a long time ago. When that happens, many quit and allow gravity to take its course. But the rest of the creatives, use the very last of our resources and much like Icarus and Daedalus, we take flight.

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